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High School... does it get you high?
2003-08-05 at 4:17 p.m.
Day two is over! And I'm not exhausted!
I felt awful this morning... I was draggy and tired, and I don't really know why. I felt like I didn't get much rest from my sleep. We all have nights like that, right? I hope so.
But today went good. Really good, actually. Tim n' Nacho are becoming something that I'm actually looking forward to at the end of the day.
They crack. Me. Up.
And everything's okay. I think Journalism is going to be my least favorite class.
See, the thing is, I like writing, but I think I only like writing what I want to write about.
I know everyone keeps saying, "Well, people who are famous authors now had to work hard to get where they are, and probably wrote about stuff they didn't care about to get there!"
Yeah, but... I don't want to be published that bad. I just want to write for my sake. I don't think I want to go into it as a living. I just enjoy it.
So, I don't know. I'll go with the class, I'll try. It's looking hard. But I'm gonna try. I have to find some current event to present to the class tomorrow...so, any suggestions?
One main problem I have with Journalism is: I don't really care about news that goes on in the world. Most "exciting" news updates leave me feeling confused, because I had no idea what they were updating on.
What's going on in the world? Anybody? I'd appreciate if you could tell me just a little... I mean, not to do my homework for me. Just so I can know what's going on.
Ooh, and I saw somebody who looks exactly like an Orlando Bloom junior. I mean, really. Just with red hair. But the face, the eyes... ah. I like him. Hee. I wanna put him in a costume with a wig and pointy ears.
Anyway, on to what I was going to talk about today:
High school is different. It's new, and it's different than anything I've ever experienced.
It's an extremely lonely place. I don't mean to sound depressed about it, because I'm not. I enjoy all of my teachers, and I'm looking forward to having class. I'm not depressed at all. I have fun people in my classes, really.
But it is lonely. If you don't know anybody, it's going to take a while for you to get to know somebody.
I've found people that I've had short conversations with, where we clicked. But I wouldn't call us "friends."
I do see them in the halls and smile and say "hey" to people I worked with, and they do it back.
Today, I actually hung with someone named... Ahsan, I think. I'm not sure how to spell it. But that is his name, I'm sure of that. We talked a little after lunch. Nothing deep, just a little chat.
And Tim is the only other person to actually speak to me outside of class. But for the second day, I'd say that's a little bit of progress.
My only observation is that it's very lonely. The teachers are there to help, so they say. And I'm sure they'll help to an extent.
But you have to take care of yourself there. It's every man for himself and his friends. And if you lack the latter, it's worse.
And it's a different environment for me. I'm used to being HOUNDED by teachers and rules. In the cafeteria, we can leave at any time.
I walked upstairs, thinking for sure that I'd be told to return until a bell rang.
Nuh-uh. I walked by about ten official looking people, and none of them gave me a first or second glance. Nobody cares.
It's so strange for me. I feel like I'm finally free, and I don't know what to do with myself. God I feel like a square now.
It's just so weird. The teachers don't have a personal relationship with the students... I miss the closeness I had with my teachers. I do. I don't miss the teachers so much. Well, okay, a couple of them. (I love you, Mrs. Ballog and Mrs. Watt)
Oh well. It's not hell. It isn't heaven, but it's bearable. And that's all I need.
And the workload isn't so bad. Yet. How 'bout them hour and half long periods, eh? Good for no homework ;)
Hmm. Okay, I'm feeling a little tired now. Love you all.
<-Ghost->
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